National Lampoon Sports Minute (Or So) on Oprah's Big Give, Miami Heat, Sacramento Kings and more
By Written by Steve Hofstetter, Keith Alberstadt, Adam Hofstetter, Ryan Murphy, Elliot Steingart, and Chris Strait (March 21, 2008) Doghouse Boxing
Sacramento Kings owners Joe and Gavin Maloof will give away a suitcase full of their own cash on an upcoming episode of Oprah's Big Give. It's the brother's biggest act of charity since signing Vitaly Potapenko.

After getting their first victory of this month, Miami Heat coach Pat Riley said that Jason Williams and Chris Quinn could match up to Hall of Famers Jerry West and Gail Goodrich. In fairness, West and Goodrich are in their 60s.

A new study has found that HGH may worsen athletic performance. In fairness to the drug, the study focused mostly upon the Kansas City Royals.

And German billiards champion Axel Buescher has been suspended for one year after testing positive for a banned substance. Wow. That's as likely as any of you knowing who Axel Buescher is. Turns out, Buescher was caught with an 8-ball.

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